Bear in mind that the BBB is a privately owned, for-profit business, NOT a government entity, and is operated like any other greedy franchise...
The catch is that 100% of their funding and income is derived from the *dues* that the very businesses they seek to "regulate", pay. Entreprenour Magazine regularly prints reports on BBB abuses of small businesses and their latest scare tactics.
As a BBB member, you can advertise the BBB "Care" logo... At an additional cost, amongst other important concessions like agreeing to arbitration/mediation, etc.
I tell the BBB *salesman* that if they've had an "inquiry" they must refer it to my office, the state or city/county government, or the local trade association.
They will also try the tactic of "Well, we'll just have to say you refused to respond". Tell them that if any information not approved by you is given out, they will have a serious legal problem. They will back right down.
Check what they are saying about you by making blind inquiries. In a sternly worded certified letter, insist that any inaccurate info be corrected immediatley. Follow up on any inaction with another letter cc'd to your atty, the federal trade commision, the state prosecutor, the city council, etc., etc., etc.
Its just like dealing with the credit bureaus.