ViperInBlack
Enthusiast
- Joined
- Oct 5, 2004
- Posts
- 973
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Over the years that I recurrently considered buying a Viper (and turning wine into water), I tried to get a handle on the demographics of those who drove these things.
The daunting price, if nothing else, suggested that they were too pricey for Jethro and Cletis, and since you see so few of them on the road, even in this City, it seemed an unanswerable question.
I tried to extrapolate what segment of the society could afford and would want a hot, noisey, wheel hopping, fearful-of-potholes, two seater with insufficient trunk room for a hamster cage.
I already knew who drove Porsches, Mercedes, BMWs, Corvettes and Beetle convertibles.
As usually evolves, I simply gave up the quest to solve this deepest of mysteries (second only to who steals that other sock that disappears in the dryer), and simply bought one for myself.
Shortly after I bought the car (ancient history, but it is now 12 days ago), I joined VCA, this forum, and bought new shop towels. There is no relationship between these actions; merely thought I would mention it.
However, I soon found out that most members of the Forums, and apparently all members of VCA, have at least six Vipers plus at least a dozen other pricey vehicles including Lear Jets and space stations. They also seem to have homes without wheels and families that are not in the witness protection program.
It soon became apparent that they were spending huge sums of money and that they have obvious access to unlimited financial resources.
Apparently, they were chiefly heirs from rich Connecticut families. There did not seem to be alternate explanations.
Yet this too did not stand the test of scrutiny. Would heirs misspell so many words? I think not. Punctuation...don't get me started.
I felt that the only way I could determine who they were, and how they got all of this loot, was to just read and listen.
The more I listened, the more confused I became, for they not only each owned eleventy-seven Vipers, but they dished out enormous amounts of money just to spend less time driving (let me explain: If you drop tens thousands of dollars into a vehicle in order to spend less time driving a quarter of a mile, this is actually not very cost effective.
In 11 seconds, you really do not have time to hear even the opening chords to a Led Zeppelin riff, and most of these people keep their radio off so that they can hear the engine. What's up with that, anyway? Gee, it is just growling and grumbling...go to a Mexican restaurant and you can have the same thing internally.
Also, it was the nature of their interactions. No one asked about what movies they had seen, linen specials at Target or even the allocation of discretionary funds in the food for oil program. They talked about motors. Motors, motors, motors, and no one ever seems to get tired of it.
They have photos of their engines. Photos! Initially, I thought that this was akin to having an MRI of your gall bladder, but apparently not.
They really enjoy each other and their discussions, and rarely does anyone call another one a name...and when it occurs, the name caller becomes contrite and reassures the name calleee that it was all just a joke.
This goes on continually...endlessly actually...and no one ever seems to tire of it. Me neither.
So, I merely had to look within myself to understand the reason why people have and spend so much money and concurrently talk about the same things repeatedly.
It was a deceptively simple yet empirically valid explanation.
drugs
Thanks for listening,
Alice
The daunting price, if nothing else, suggested that they were too pricey for Jethro and Cletis, and since you see so few of them on the road, even in this City, it seemed an unanswerable question.
I tried to extrapolate what segment of the society could afford and would want a hot, noisey, wheel hopping, fearful-of-potholes, two seater with insufficient trunk room for a hamster cage.
I already knew who drove Porsches, Mercedes, BMWs, Corvettes and Beetle convertibles.
As usually evolves, I simply gave up the quest to solve this deepest of mysteries (second only to who steals that other sock that disappears in the dryer), and simply bought one for myself.
Shortly after I bought the car (ancient history, but it is now 12 days ago), I joined VCA, this forum, and bought new shop towels. There is no relationship between these actions; merely thought I would mention it.
However, I soon found out that most members of the Forums, and apparently all members of VCA, have at least six Vipers plus at least a dozen other pricey vehicles including Lear Jets and space stations. They also seem to have homes without wheels and families that are not in the witness protection program.
It soon became apparent that they were spending huge sums of money and that they have obvious access to unlimited financial resources.
Apparently, they were chiefly heirs from rich Connecticut families. There did not seem to be alternate explanations.
Yet this too did not stand the test of scrutiny. Would heirs misspell so many words? I think not. Punctuation...don't get me started.
I felt that the only way I could determine who they were, and how they got all of this loot, was to just read and listen.
The more I listened, the more confused I became, for they not only each owned eleventy-seven Vipers, but they dished out enormous amounts of money just to spend less time driving (let me explain: If you drop tens thousands of dollars into a vehicle in order to spend less time driving a quarter of a mile, this is actually not very cost effective.
In 11 seconds, you really do not have time to hear even the opening chords to a Led Zeppelin riff, and most of these people keep their radio off so that they can hear the engine. What's up with that, anyway? Gee, it is just growling and grumbling...go to a Mexican restaurant and you can have the same thing internally.
Also, it was the nature of their interactions. No one asked about what movies they had seen, linen specials at Target or even the allocation of discretionary funds in the food for oil program. They talked about motors. Motors, motors, motors, and no one ever seems to get tired of it.
They have photos of their engines. Photos! Initially, I thought that this was akin to having an MRI of your gall bladder, but apparently not.
They really enjoy each other and their discussions, and rarely does anyone call another one a name...and when it occurs, the name caller becomes contrite and reassures the name calleee that it was all just a joke.
This goes on continually...endlessly actually...and no one ever seems to tire of it. Me neither.
So, I merely had to look within myself to understand the reason why people have and spend so much money and concurrently talk about the same things repeatedly.
It was a deceptively simple yet empirically valid explanation.
drugs
Thanks for listening,
Alice
