SHOW DOWN AT RIVER CITY DRAG STRIP, SANTA CLARA TX.OCTOBER 28

[Dave Golder]

Hey BIG NORM... I DON'T KNOW IF JOHN CANDY HAD A CUP CAR OR NOT. BUT SPEAKING OF CANDY BIG FELLA I GOT AN ALL DAY SUCKER FOR YA!

Make sure you bring that Renntech sled out there. Also it might help a little if you take off some of that heavy duty gold chain action. Might save ya about 100 lbs and a tenth. Also do us all a favor and button up your shirt so we don't have to see that manly chest of yours....

And speaking of SHAKEDOWN... is he going to bring that 15 sec Cobra and run Kyle's 15 second lightning?

 

[Prashant]

Hilarious, you can’t go somewhere and Pay for better smack talk then this!

 

[Jason-Middle Tennessee]

My wife & I will be there too. Hope to see all of you again at this great event.

 

[TX WHOS YOUR DADDY]

SW AKA THE GOLDENBOY/SHIEK......YOU DONT NEED TO WORRY ABOUT ANYTHING EXCEPT YOUR OWN S**T.IVE RESERVED THAT DAY FOR RIVER CITY.I WILL BRING THAT ZR1 LOAD YOU SOLD ME A COUPLE YEARS BACK AT A HIGH PREMIUM WHEN I HAD A WEAK MOMENT.I PUT A REALLY COOL BORLA EXHAUST SYSTEM ON IT AND THOUGHT U MIGHT WANT TO HEAR IT.IM LOOKING FORWARD TO SOME QTR MILE DRIVING TIPS FROM THE BEST.DAVE GOLDER IT ALWAYS GREAT TO HEAR FROM A PRO SUCH AS YOU.THANKS FOR THE KIND WORDS!PLZ STAY IN TOUCH WITH YOURSELF.BEST REGARDS! NORM KOERNER

 

[Jason-Middle Tennessee]

NORM are you the same guy I meet at the Houston Viper Club meeting a few weeks back? You have the Red W/Silver Stripes GTS right with the wing?

 

[TX WHOS YOUR DADDY]

JASON-MIDDLE TENNESSE....HAVE NOT HAD THE PLEASURE OF MEETING U SIR.....I DONT HAVE A RED VIPER GTS...I DO HAVE A HENNESSY 65O GTS AND A HENNESSY VENOM 700 RT.LOOK FORWARD TO MEETING U AT RIVER CITY OCT.28TH.JOHN HENNESSY GOOD BUDDY SPEAKING OF GREAT CHARACTERS YOU ARE AT THE TOP OF THE LIST.....AKA TEXAS TUNA, COLUMBUS OF THE VIPERWORLD....WILL U HAVE MY VENOM TURBO 800 DONE BY THEN?KYLE KENT AKA THE PROFFESOR UPDATE ON THE PIG FARMERS.....DATELINE DECATUR.... THEY ALL SAY ONK! ONK! AND WISH U THE BEST.IF U NEED TO FIGURE OUT WHY THE RACELOGIC CONTROLLER ON THE VENOM TT 800 IS ERRATIC THEY CAN HELP U OUT FOR A SMALL CONSULTING FEE.ALSO THE ZR1 TT WILL BE READY FOR WAR IN TWO WEEKS..SW WILL U BE RUNNING STOCK STREET TIRES ON THE M5?IWILL BE RUNNING STOCK STREET TIRES SO IF YOU SHOW UP WITH SLICKS OR DRAG RADIALS IM OUT ..LADIES AND GENTLEMEN THIS IS ONE EVENT THAT WILL GO DOWN IN THE VIPER HISTORY BOOKS.DONT MISS IT.BEST REGARDS! NORM KOERNER AKA NORMA,BUBBA GUMP

 

[Dave Golder]

SHAKEDOWN:

2001 Yellow Z06 :1/18 scale Maisto
1998 Siver 650 Venom Viper Photo Only
2001 Secret LS7 White Camaro Norms Car.. I am a wanna be
1987 Black Turbo V6 Grand National Kyles car.... another wanna be
2001 CL500 MB 1:24 scale ertel
1999 Ford F550 Belongs to Derek Easty
1996 Peterbuilt Tow Rig "The pretender" no longer exists
53' Featherlite Trailer "Belongs to Janni in NC"
46' Skater "My Pleasure Boat" "The pleasure is in your Palm"

Your real car
1998 Ford Mustang Cobra Yellow 288 RWHP un-corrected
Your a 15 sec wanna be Norm

 

[HouseofSpeed]

You know, I didn't think it was possible for a Z06 to run a 13...but if there are any other Z06 owners out there, Dave is your man...guaranteed to pilot your car into the 13s with headers and exhaust. If you have a top-end package, he is probably good for a 14 with an 0.

Now, I have one question for the parts man....you know what the brake lights of a new F150 look like??? Bring the red wagon...your chrome wheels....old taco wrappers...Walt(cause he won't take his own car)....little orphan Annie.....all the dogs in Montgomery County....and I will leave the lights on for you at the end of the track.

Love and Kisses,
Kyle "wannabe Dave Golder" Kent

 

[Dave Golder]

Kyle "I Like Boys" Kent...AKA House of Lack of Speed"

<<<Dave is your man...guaranteed to pilot your car into the 13s with headers and exhaust. If you have a top-end package, he is probably good for a 14 with an 0.>>>

Kyle the only way I could pop a 14 with a top end package would be if it came from the House of Speed. I have seen you turn your low 13 second stock Lightning into a ground shattering high 14 sec ride. With your talent and unrelentless quality your shop puts into a car I do agree with your top end package 14's would be a possibility. Maybe even a 15 flat.

Dave

 

[HouseofSpeed]

Dave....that was a pretty weak attempt at SMACK...but, somehow, your lack of effort doesn't surprise me. Must have been too much time in the male bath houses in Japan...all the steam and *** juice must have gone to your head.

http://www.geocities.com/john_candy_tribute/gallery10.jpg

On a lighter note, I did find this pic of you from a personal appearance a few years ago....looks like Steve knows you pretty well....did you run a 13 in his car too????

http://www.geocities.com/john_candy_tribute/gallery3_10.jpg

Look forward to seeing you and the entourage at the next event....

 

[Dave Golder]

Shakedown,

Real nice..... Anytime on the paintball action. I will save a little of that all day sucker I promised Norm for ya. I heard you do some of the "best head work" in Houston. No doubt your Cobra has not seen the back of any Vette or Viper because word from Jason and Kyle is that you were a little scared to run it at RCR. They didn't belive the $4.00 difference in entry fee vs. spectator fee story.

If you are able to get Kyle's head out of your lap show him how to fix the picture of John Candy and Kyle's first wife.

 

[Dave Golder]

Kyle,

I found this picture of you in your slimmer days. Think it was taken at the VOI. I sure don't want to know what you were doing with Brad, or more like what is Brad doing to you.

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This picture was taken very recently I believe. Maybe a few weeks ago at the lunch hangout. See you Thursday by the way... You're paying for lunch.

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[Dave Golder]

Now I know why "House of Speed" and "Shakedown" are so screwed up... Just look at their fearless leader.

<center>The Texas "Tuna"</center><FONT size="6"><center>The Texas "Tuna"</center></FONT s>

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[Dave Golder]

Here is a picture taken at River City Raceway.... Is it "Shakedown"..."Louse of Speed" or maybe JC or Norm... can't be Norm he doesn't wear shorts.... or is it..... who knows but from the look of it he can sure talk a lot of shi$. Looks like he had a wiping issue!

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[Dave Golder]

C'mon Kyle... you can figure it out.... If not ask one of your kids. Must be the same gift God gave you for computers as he gave you for working on performance cars.

 

[Dave Golder]

Kyle,

I see you still have not got the pictures to work yet. Maybe you have not paid for last months service. Does your wife know about your ***** addiction?


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[Prashant]

Man, and hits just keeeep on comin!! Kyle Balls in your court.

 

[Dave Golder]

Here we have a picture of Kyle's mentor Norm before he became independetly wealthy. Norm was a cop a I am sure a wild one at that. He retired and started a band that many of you might have heard of... years ago. The Village People. Victor is his stage name... real name is Norma... right SW?
Y. Young
M. Men
C. Craving
A. ***

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[HouseofSpeed]

Again here are the shots of Dave...


Dave realizing that size does matter.....

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The world's greatest NAPA man in a serious moment....

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And finally, the in-car camera from another blistering 14 sec pass in the Z06....

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[Dave Golder]

Kyle.... see it works when you stay off those pay sites. At least we know where all your money goes. Pull's down 6 figures at Hennessey and drives a 14 second sled. That ***** addiction of yours is killer. Is it $25 per everytime you access or just monthly?

The bottom picture of John Candy is good. Looks kinda like me after a 233 mph blast down Highway 318... except I look a little more stressed.

 

[Prashant]

Coming Soon a E True Hollywood story on what ever happend to Norma, John Candy, Victor, and the Salty Taco. Where did they come from? What Texas Cult are they members of? and what are the connections?

 

[Dave Golder]

Prashant "Gigalo" Patel so good of our leader to speak up and stand up for us poor Houston folk. I saw you hanging out the other night on Westhimer over by the bus station with your new custom paint job. Looks real nice. Are they paying you to endorse the product or is it free samples?

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[BWoodbury]

Note to self. Never, never allow any of these folks to take your picture at any Viper event...

 

[Prashant]

For the LOVE OF GOD V-10!! get help posting a picture!!

 

[TX WHOS YOUR DADDY]

TO MY GOOD FRIEND JOHN HENNESSY AKA THE TEXAS TUNA......ITS ALWAYS A PLEASURE TO HEAR FROM ONE OF THE GREAT MASTER TUNERS ON THE CUTTING EDGE OF VIPER TECHNOLOGY.I WAS WONDERING IF U COULD SHARE YOUR THEORY OF INCREASING OR DECREASING HORSEPOWER FACTOR WHEN AIR FILTERS ARE APPLIED TO THE VENOM 800 TT.WHAT ARE THE DYNAMICS AS APPLIED TO TURBONIC GAS ENGINES AND NON TURBONIC APPLICATIONS?WILL U BE RUNNING WITH OR WITH OUT AIR FILTERS AT THE RIVER CITY SHOWDOWN?DO YOU THINK THAT IF ALL US VENOM OWNERS WOULD REMOVE THE AIR FILTERS FROM OUR SNAKES WE MIGHT PICK UP A FEW HORSES?WILL U BE SENDING OUT AN UPDATED SHOP MEMO TO ALL VENOM OWNERS ADDRESSING THIS ISSUE?THANK YOU IN ADVANCE.BEST REGARDS!NORM KOERNER......P.S.I WILL HAVE A BUNCH OF BIG SALTY SPECIAL TACOS JUST FOR YOU WHEN U GET HUNGRY AT RIVER CITY.

 

[TX WHOS YOUR DADDY]

PRASHANT YOUR NEW PAINT JOB IS REAL NICE! DONT REMEMBER THE LETTERING ON THE HOOD AT OUR VIPER MEETING?ARE U A VICE PRESIDENT AND A MAJOR STOCKHOLDER WITH PFIZER?BEST REGARDS!NORM KOERNER

 

[Dave Golder]

I realized it when I always saw him limping, and by all the baggy clothes.

 

[HouseofSpeed]

V-10 Power....here's my truck, you and SW may have to combine your trucks to cover it....

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[Jason-Middle Tennessee]

I think we all know why Prashant is always has girls drooling over him. He's the "Houston ****" Right guys?

 

[Maverick The Electrician]

It must be the air and decals.